Todo list OR Regret list?

This time is all about Ph.D dissertation,
All the things I wanna to do have to be put into the todo list,
Let them wait there for me to pick them up again in months,
The books I wanna read, the programs I wanna learn, the topic I wanna study,
The trip I wanna have, The movie I wanna watch.....
I would rather believe I will never do them in my whole life,
When I finally got my Ph.D and pick up this list,
I would definitely not be in the mood to do anything like these stuff.
So it's just a regret list, list up all the things I missed this year.
It has been four years.
I had thought I would have a successful 4 years.
But when I finally get the chance to write the dissertation and look
back the 4 years,
It's hard to tell it's success.
In fact, it's pathetic.
I thought I can write an IEEE paper, but I didn't;
I thought I can be an expert in this field, but I am not,
I thought I can have some amazing study result, but I can't.
I don't know what I have in this Ph.D trip.
I can't tell it's because I am not work hard enough or just because I am
not a Ph.D type person.
I even have nothing to blame for this terrible result because I don't
wanna to blame myself.

I find my wife and have a happy family.
That's the only successful result I got in the past 4 years.

I don't know

The last week, I tried like tens of latex editor programs, and the
result is none of them is perfect for me. By the way, last week I was
very very busy, the tests, the papers, ..... I really need some rest and
work on my thesis as quick as possible. After all, I am up side down now
and don't know how to deal with all these mass.

事情真多，兼问题一个

首先问个问题，各位的LaTeX编辑器是什么？我发现WinEdit对汉语的支持很差，没
办法正常断句，真是不爽，而TexMaker编译有没有 winedit方便。VIM学起来估计
要费些时间吧。不知道大家用的是什么编辑器呢？
最近事情很多，首先被某人要求写文章，当年被他说"郭沫若"，郭的特点就在于领
会领导意图吧，我就以为要写篇领导颂歌，结果领导上午还说"好文，投！"下午就
让我撤稿，难道我文章写得太肉麻了？不管怎么说两天都费在这事情上了。
最近做试验的事情也很多，我总是希望有一天我早晨去坐车，然后去做试验，完全
是个做体力活的人，不需要动脑筋，可是不可能。其实别人做的也挺好，可能是我
这个太操心了。

心情不好

今天心情不好，不过跟喉舌大肆宣传的东西没有关系，
是自己的事情。
当烦人的事情袭来，我发现我是多么的讨厌它们。
人生其实应该多些变化，才能显得丰富多彩，
如果从本科进入一个地方，到退休再离开，
应该会是一个安稳，成功，平淡的人生，
我会喜欢吗？
我忽然间觉着眼前的这些人真可怜。

真的不是盖得

遥想当年，其实也就是去年，体能测试本人3千米可是跑到12分多的人，
今年又要体能测试，
今天下午去跑三千，果然不出盖的，
一口气跑了15分半，基本上连滚打趴的就下来了，
比起上次跑2k就放弃已经进步不小了，
这次体能测试我是抱着必不过的信心，呵呵
现如今博士毕业把我逼得：
睡都不会觉了，跑都不会步了，吃都不会饭了，博都不会客了，
不得不感慨，我真不是盖的！